learning to blog

Blogging is a universe that I don’t know much about.  You would think since I have a blog, I must know something about how this works.  I get so tired when I start to look into what stuff is on my blog site.  My husband, Buzz, even bought me a few blogging for dummy books when I started this thing up last year.  But even skimming through those books I can’t focus long enough to put anything into practice.  Like what is a wigit, is that spelled right?  What is a permalink?  This, I think, links you to something?  What is a plugin?  I feel like that must connect you somewhere?  What is a shortlink?  Is that like a short cut for blogging?  Why are there so many updates on this blog site?  What is jetpack and akismet?  What is a tag?  Is that like on facebook?  What does insert read more tag mean?  That seems like I am not using the correct words but that is on here.  See….  I am getting so board and sleepy and I am sure you are too.  Now I need a nap.  All I know how to do is type words on here and post it.  Yawn…

The only reason I started this blog was because I was trying to get my mom off my back.  She wants me to do something with my life and not look back on all these years and wish I would have done something meaningful.  I’m sorry mom.  Raising kids and running a house full of starving, needy people that constantly need a ride somewhere, or have appointments they need to be taken to, or they need to talk about their day, or they need to cry on my shoulder for 2 hours, or they can’t sleep for 7 weeks in a row, or they are throwing up or have a fever and can’t be alone for 5 seconds, and require clean clothes, that won’t shower or bathe unless I harass them every 2-4 days, that need help with their homework, that are stressed about puberty that is on its way,  that fall down and cry, that punch each other and cry, that get hurt wrestling, that run into walls and doors and stairs and chairs and swings and trees and trampolines and cry and need me.  That is not meaningful enough?  I guess I can see what she means.   My mom’s influence on me is so great, and by great I mean I can’t get her words out of my head sometimes.  She has a way of overwhelming me and then instead of motivating me to take action, I end up doing nothing.  Then she has to go back to loving me the way I am. This must be some childhood issue that resurfaces every once and awhile.  Like, she wanted me to find a way for people to follow me on my blog.   Back in December, for 3 days she wouldn’t stop talking about spacechimp or something about a monkey that allows people to get alerted when I post a new blog.    Why would I want this?  She felt it was really important for the 7 people reading my blog to get an email every time I posted a new one.  This freaked me out so much because I don’t know what I am doing, and I have a family that takes all of my time, and I think my dryer is broken, and I need to get my wood floors refinished, and our hot tub is broken, and Blu has a book report on Steve Job’s due next week, and I am not a writer, and I don’t want anyone reading this, and I started this blog to get her to stop telling me I need to do something with my life, and why isn’t that working, and I thought this was a good start, but if you must know I am freaking out too, because who am I?  What am I doing with my life?  Why am I always in work out clothes?  Why do I always need a shower?  Why do I feel like crying?  I don’t know, and that is overwhelming me and I have to go pick up my kids from school in 30 minutes.  Is that enough time to figure this out?  So you can see why I haven’t posted anything for 6 months.

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